Imagine if the internet died!
If one day — say February 31 — the human race attempted to access their cyberlives, only to hit the startup button and …
POOF
How would Dave in Dublin check his bank balance? How would Mabel in Montreal watch a YouTube video of her new niece in Finland? How would Christian in Christchurch book flights to Sydney for business? How would Natalie from New York answer her 6 year-old’s question about the origins of iridology.
Imagine if you didn’t have Facebook at your fingertips, Wikipedia at your whiteboard or Livejournal in your lap. What if your blog was suddenly flushed down the webual toilet, finally finding rest among the trillions of bloggages produced each day? How would you communicate with people that don’t live in your house, or don’t pass you in work corridors on on daily routes?
What if we were Google Denied?
It’s like a serious disease, isn’t it? Google Denied!
Questions would have to be answered from ye olde fashioned research. Libraries would be visited and encyclopedias rummaged through. We’d have to call people on the phone to organize appointments, work meetings, social things and relay information. We’d even need to tell them a joke in person, rather than sending one through on email.
We’d lose time. With these phone calls would come conversation and interaction, asides and interjections and pauses. We wouldn’t get as much done! Looking through books would lead to distractions from pictures and other headings and perhaps an inscription left there from a former student of the work!
We couldn’t download music (not that we ever would) or movies or television shows (which we’ve only heard about doing). We couldn’t take quizzles on Facebook or play weird games that put us in unusual setting and set us up with strange looking caricatures of weirdness.
How would I be able to predict the weather for the next week? Or find a direction without Google maps or be inspired about what to cook for dinner?
Mostly, how would I keep abreast of the folk of the internet faraway tree? Those special people who exist within my cabling and are as real to me as if their voice spoke as I read a newspaper on the train. Yet in an era when the internet and the high-speed, demonic energy cable highway, faster- than-the-zing-of-light technology exists (to make our lives more efficient, easier, better, advanced) we are still busier than ever.
Our lives haven’t slowed down with the increments in technological wowdom. We razzle along at a speed our forefathers and mothers would gape at, so if the internet died on February 31st, we might just … slow … slow … slow right down. NO 365 emails (per day) to read after a two week holiday. No tweets to twitter about, no blogs to bookmark, no updates to incorporate, no plugins to upload, download, implode.
The internet is dead.
Perhaps I would cope for a day. If that. So, what’s that saying about me? A person who lived without the buzz of the net, the instant information, communication, gratification for (at least) 30 years of life? Imagine if I’d been ‘born into it’, never having known a world without laptop, google, Facebook, iPhone, MacBook, Yahoo, gmail, friend’s lists, cyber bullying, attachments, hyperlinks and html?
If I had never lived without the internet, and it suddenly died, I wonder if I, too, would cease to exist? If that wire, that frizzles from the front of my cranium, cranks into the hard drive and fuses me to the hub of technology, would lose its motherboard heartbeat and delete my brain.
Maybe. But one thing’s for sure. If Feb. 31 ever comes around, I’m taking my Google, the internet connection and laptop, sitting in a tree and declaring it the first cyber leap year.
Then I’ll be writing it up (as an expert, of course) in a Wikipedia post that will never exist, because the internet has blown a gasket.
OMG will be wailed from every corner of the globe, and we won’t be able to Google that to find out what on earth it means!
Related Reading:
If you enjoyed this article, please consider sharing it!
Welcome to Fangirl Sings the Blues
If you enjoy reading about the characters of Bridezilla, Henley & Cass, Veronica Lord, The Carpet Whisperers, Volare, King Pin, and anything else written here, you might like to try a novel or three:
The Fangirl Series
Number 3 - Latest Release
Number 2
Number 1
The Fangirl Series
Number 3 - Latest Release
Number 2
Number 1
Connect with us:
9 Responses to Oh, My Google
Great post! While it’s a scary thought, a big part of me would welcome the sudden expansion of my time: my life would suddenly slow down substantially. On the other hand, I would mourn all the connections I’d lose. (Good thing I know your address in case of snail mail necessity!)
Thank goodness for snail mail, dear. I would FEDex moiself to you, if necessary *g*
Yes to things slowing down. In a way, that would be lovely, but probably not gunner happen any time soon
Thanks for the visit, petal.
Interesting post, Rosie. I do think Google and the internet are a great way to save time and find lots of answers quickly. But sometimes I get a bit nostalgic and wish for the world to go slower. Everything’s moving too fast, and the future seems even faster, if that makes sense at all.
I guess, in a way, the internet is fantastic and easy, and allows us to keep in touch more frequently. But on some level, it also created a huge ball of “frenziness”, and there are too many websites out there now, too much information, too many things that are only one click away from us, too much everything. No one is entitled to a private life anymore. Even people who aren’t on Facebook are being tagged on pictures and all. I don’t know… It makes me question what the internet is really about, these days.
While I think the internet can be very useful, I know I won’t have difficulties saying goodbye to my cell phone and laptop when I leave for Australia. In fact, I can’t wait to be free and unreachable for a little while, and just tilt my head back and take the time to smell the flowers and fresh air of the Land of Oz.
Interesting thoughts, Maureen, and thanks for sharing them here.
Unlike you, I have difficulties being without my mobile (cell) or laptop, but I wish I didn’t. It’s quite the viscous circle, isn’t it? The more we keep in touch, the more we need to keep in touch, the more communication we probably GET…and it goes on. And on.
I know a girl that went back to work after a week away recently, to find over a thousand emails in her inbox. To me…that’s incredible, but that’s typical for her.
I agree with your views on the net and google-goggle being wonderful and quick ways to access info. I love online dictionaries, wiki, facts at my fingers. LOVE it. But I also hear you about privacy, facebook, photos and those types of issues.
VERY interesting, innit!~? Hope all is good.
I have no problem being away from my laptop. I harldy ever turn it on anymore, except to check my inbox and some important websites, and reply to emails and such every now and then. I used to be a laptop addict. Once upon a time, I would spend HOURS reading blogs, playing on LJ, searching things on the internet, etc. It was so unhealthy. Now I only use the laptop because there’s a blue-ray option, therefore I can watch Boyfriend’s Lost blu-rays. *g*
My iPhone? Hmm… That’s another issue. I can’t live without it. How do I put this? I feel “naked” if I don’t have it with me -- you know what I mean? Because a big part of my life is stored in the memory of that phone, and I need to have it with me at all times. I have access to the internet on it, and differents apps, of course -- that I hardly use, I have to say. So, really, apart from checking my inbox, visiting FB a few times a day, and the LJ flist, I mostly use it to send text messages or emails, and call people.
It IS an interesting topic. Thanks for the chat, and have a nice week. x
Perhaps you have the same link with your phone as I do with my internet and laptop? Sounds like it is too.
It’s an unhealthy relationship for sure *g*. But, it sure is fun, lady. However, if the internet was to die suddenly, we still have BOOKS and film and FOOD and all those wonderful old fashioned ways to pass the time ; )
Thanks Maureen. Enjoy your week too. x
However, if the internet was to die suddenly, we still have BOOKS and film and FOOD and all those wonderful old fashioned ways to pass the time ; )
Oh, I know, LOL. And honestly, wouldn’t it be better to focus on these things rather than wasting our time on the internet and computer? Look at the characters of Lost. They have no internet, no cell phones, and yet they have plenty of things to keep them busy.
I shall delete all my internet accounts now, and live without a laptop. I can already see the light at the end of the tunnel, haha.
Bye, now!
*goes back in her hatch*
Gosh, it’s something to ponder isn’t it? I would have SO much more free time and be so much more productive! But then…I wouldn’t be able to reach customers either. Maybe if they had a ‘once a week’ internet day? That would be really good for me because I have no self discipline.
I need to get off here, and finish my book that’s printed on paper, and pat my dog that’s real (I know this because he farts) and write a letter to my exstepgrandmother, because she lives in the place of no internet, and seems pretty happy without it.
Nice food for thought, Rosie!
I LOVE your once a week internet day as a back up, Sarah. What you’ve said here suits me exactly as well:
>>> I would have SO much more free time and be so much more productive! But then…I wouldn’t be able to reach customers either. Maybe if they had a ‘once a week’ internet day? That would be really good for me because I have no self discipline.<<<
A perfect solution, and YES to being more productive if there was no internetz.
Thanks for chewing the fat for thought with me, my dearie. chat soon.